Balancing Act

You know sometimes when I'm out and about, I like to people watch.  Most of the time it is simply a way to keep my mind busy while I'm waiting.  But, on other occasions, well, it's more akin to visual torture, and it's all due to a lack of balance.  Let me explain.

When I say balance, it's not about on a beam or a tight rope, it's about proportion and cut of clothing (make up too, but that's another post). All too often, I see gorgeous women dressed in sacks of cloth they call clothes with no hint of the beauty underneath (it just makes you look larger). Or, I see attractive women with what amounts to a spandex suit instead of well cut pieces. Or further still, I see a lovely thing showing both all leg and everything but the nipple up top.  Don't get me wrong, volume, form fitting, and a bit of skin all have their place, just not necessarily from head to toe. Which brings us to the idea of a well balanced outfit.

Let me give you some examples:

Problem 1: The dreaded mom jean frump

 

Surprisingly, a lot of women wear mom jeans and don't know it. They wore high waisted, tapered jeans back in high school and never thought to see what those new fangled mid or low rise jeans felt like. Do you see what that bulk of material is doing to her crotch? Well, it's doing the same thing to her rear. The high waist is binding at the natural waistline emphasizing the dreaded lower belly bulge. No, it doesn't have anything to do with her size. She could be a size 2 and it would still create an illusion of a bump. I'll discuss color balance at another time.

The solution? Mid rise or (depending on your age and/or body type) low rise jeans! I don't mean you need a thong showing booty jean. I mean a dark wash, mid rise or low rise. Don't know what the heck I mean? Stand up and find your belly button. Now, place 2 fingers beneath it, that's mid rise. Three or more fingers? That's low rise. It allows the jeans to give structure to your frame without emphasizing anything you don't want emphasized.

Here's what the alternative would look like. And yes, I chose a woman with curves to give a proper comparison.

Look at the difference! Her leg line in lengthened by the boot cut, the mid rise is just skimming over her belly, and her form fitting top shows off the proportions of her waist and hips. No crotch bulges here! In other words, her outfit is balanced. Form fitting on top, less so on the bottom half. Now, that's how you do it.

What about trousers, you say? The same principle applies. More volume on bottom with, say, a wide leg trouser? Then a more body conscious top.

Professional, proportional, and balanced.

Problem number 2: Too tight all over! LEGGINGS ARE NOT PANTS-EVER!!!!

This attractive woman has reduced her lovely figure to lumps and bumps, not to mention that she now looks like a ho. Tight top, leggings for pants, and for that extra ho-like quality, heels. I mean, dressed like that she looks like she may start working that pole.

An alternative would be to balance form fitting pants with a more voluminous shirt.

Yes, her pants are quite tight, but the material is heavier keeping all the imperfections hidden. She has on a loose fitting sweater that-here's the key-balances the tightness on the bottom half of her body. Nothing ho-like here. Notice that she also has flats on in this outfit. Heels would not be inappropriate here, especially if she were going out for drinks or on a date, but for an easy day look, this is how it's done.

Problem 3:  Too short, too much cleavage

We all want to be sexy. We want to turn heads when we walk into a room. But, we also don't want to be featured on crotchshot.com or have a wardrobe malfunction with our nipple as the principle player.

Again, nothing wrong with skin, but this is more of a fantasy for her partner kind of outfit. Now, let's assume that she is going out to a club or at least just out.  That is what makes this outfit so very wrong. The skirt barely covers the crotch, the lace, the boobs, it all screams, "I'm cheap! And have low self-esteem!" 

Again, we go back to balance. If you're going to show a bit of skin up top, then you need to cover up a bit on the bottom. Wanna show off your legs? Then, put the boobs away.

A day look that exemplifies this:

Her skirt is form fitting, shows leg, but goes no higher than mid thigh. Her shirt is loose, but not frumpy and shows no cleavage.  She looks elegant, sexy, and appropriate.

Or if you prefer to show more up top:

So, notice that she is showing quite a bit of skin up top, but the length of her dress is to the knee. With metallic heels, she is ready to go out, but doesn't look like she's going to work the streets.

Problem 4: College girl (or, God forbid, older) Frump

This is a phenomenon that I cannot get my head around. At the University of Alabama the majority of sweet, young things in their youthful prime, walk about in herd-like groups wearing oversized t-shirts (cut like a guy's) and Nike tempo shorts.

Let me explain what this does to their lovely figures. The t shirt makes their torsos look like one huge box. No chest, no waist, no nothing.  Just a big box. The Nike shorts, however comfortable they may be for running or working out, makes their asses (yes, I'm so incensed that I am cussing) look like big, lumpy diapers that need changing, if you get my meaning.

Think I'm making this up?

That's not a costume they have on-that's their first (of oh so many) sorority t shirts.  Every where you go, there they are. Out to dinner? T shirt and tempos. Shopping? T shirt and tempos. On a date (for the love of God!) You guessed it, t shirt and tempos. 

Girls,throw the guys a bone! Look like a female! You're not working out 24/7-wear real clothes!

Here are but a few alternatives:

 How about sandals and cute skirt? You can actually see her waistline!

Wanna go more casual? Ok!

See? Cute skinnies, a top, a jacket, and a pair of boots. It is fall after all...

Like a Parisian vibe? That's cool, just put on a black, fitted t, straight leg or skinny jeans, and black flats. You could totally walk the whole campus in that!

Don't like skinnies? No problem! Look how awesome she looks in her boot cut (almost flared jeans) with a fitted sweater and a scarf for a bit of interest.

Got a date? Throw on a summer dress, a cardi, then belt the whole thing. Voila! You'll look chic and feminine. Much more fitting for a romantic night than the same thing you wear to the gym.

Moral of our story (well, my rant):

All of the outfits shown can be tweeked to suit your taste, body type, age, etc. But they all have the basic rules working for them.

Rule #1: If you wear volume on top, wear something more fitted on the bottom.

Rule #2: Vice versa of #1. If you wear volume on the bottom, wear something more body conscious on top.

Rule #3: You can show cleavage or you can show leg, but not both. More skin does not necessarily equal sexy, it appears desperate or insecure.

Rule #4: Make an effort! Just because it's comfortable for the gym or when you are home sick does not mean you should wear it everywhere. That means gym clothes, sweats, and pajama bottoms should be used for their purposes. We don't want to see you like that. Seriously. We don't.

Rule #5: Have fun! These are more guidelines than hard and fast rules. Within reason you can play with them to find what makes you happy and confident.

Isn't that what all this is about any way? Walking out of our house feeling confident to face whatever may come our way? Feeling like you are sexy, professional, elegant, cute, edgy, mod, sweet, or whatever adjective you want to be.

After all this fashion talk, what to eat? How about one of our favorites? Black bean and corn salad. It has been a staple in our house since my dear friend, Linda Clements, served it to me eons ago.

 The great thing about this salad is that I almost always have the ingredients on hand, I can change it to suit my mood. Add jalapenos, avocados, green onions, cilantro, any or all-it's all good!

Black Bean and Corn Salad:

1 can black beans, drained and rinsed

1 can corn, drained and rinsed (I prefer Mexicorn)

2 green onions, finely sliced

1 avocado, diced

1 tomato, seeded and diced

1 small bunch cilantro, chopped

1/2 or 1(to taste) jalapeno, finely diced

3 T. balsamic vinegar

1 t. ground cumin

1/4 t. salt

1/3 c. olive oil

Combine first 7 ingredients in a large bowl. Stir to mix. In a small bowl, mix vinegar, cumin and salt with a whisk. Gradually add oil while whisking to form an emulsion.  Pour over bean mixture. Toss gently to coat.

I serve these with pita chips or corn chips, both equally delicious.

Now that I've ranted ad nauseum about balance clothing, go out and make me proud to people watch you!

Cheers!

Cooking In Stilettos: Squeezing that Last Bit of Juiciness from Summer

Cooking In Stilettos: Squeezing that Last Bit of Juiciness from Summer: Remember that fall that I greeted so cheerfully last post? Well, it was just a teaser. The highs have been back in the high 80's or even low...

Squeezing that Last Bit of Juiciness from Summer

Remember that fall that I greeted so cheerfully last post? Well, it was just a teaser. The highs have been back in the high 80's or even low 90's, so it hasn't been ideal to break out the hot chocolate just yet.  But, you know what they say, make the most of the situation! In my case that meant a late harvest peach dish. Specifically, Tipsy Peach Glazed Pork Tenderloin. 

Earlier this week one of my lovely readers sent me this wonderful photo of her inspirational apron:

Photo courtesy of Effie Lally

I mean, "Will Cook for Shoes"? That is the motto of my life! (Well, that and "Go forth and be fabulous!") It also made me realize that while I have discussed what I wear while I'm cooking, I have never discussed the fact that I wear aprons (of the awesomely sexy variety) always. Let me repeat, ALWAYS. Nothing will ruin the mood of an amazing meal in the making than looking down and seeing tomato paste on cashmere, or olive oil on silk, or, well, you get the idea.

So, thanks to wonderful friends and family I have quite the collection of aprons to choose from each time I cook. And, yes, I do wear each one according to my outfit. I guess it just seems more fun that when someone sees me cooking (hey, hubby, wink wink) or if someone stops by in the middle of prep, that I am not this hot and splattered sight.  Instead, I am Donna Reed and Rita Hayworth all rolled into one. With a dash of a young Mia Farrow just for kicks.

Without further adieu, I give you my apron collection, my lovelies. 

The one that started it all. From Anthropologie.

A Christmas gift from my girls, they know me well! (Also the one I am wearing today.)

Another gift from my girls. I feel like Betty Boop when I wear it, don't ask me why.

A gift from a wonderful friend along with a fab coffee mug. That's the way to start the day!

Sexiest apron ever! I am always tempted to close the blinds and just wear this as a surprise for the hubby. Maybe I could find a seamstress and have a sundress like this made instead! It was also a gift from a dear friend along with the best cocktail book in the world. I mean, who doesn't want to have a Screaming Blue Orgasm?

As to resources, there are tons, especially with the whole retro resurgence. TJMaxx has been known to carry some cuties. Of course, there's Anthropologie.  But, there are even more online resources. Kitchen Threadz are original designs, they offer a huge variety, and are drop dead adorable! So, if you don't have an apron, go get one. Then, go in the kitchen and make Tipsy Peach Glazed Pork Tenderloin, hot stuff!

(Sorry no pick on this one. Got the dish all plated up, and the camera battery was dead. So, insert a mouthwatering luscious piece of pork here.) 

Tipsy Peach Glazed Pork Tenderloin

• 3 cups chopped peeled peaches (about 1 1/2 pounds)
• 1 cup dry white wine
• 1/4 cup sugar
• 1 teaspoon salt, divided
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper, divided
• 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
• 2 tablespoons honey
• 1 teaspoon chili powder
• 1/2 teaspoon paprika
• 1/4 teaspoon ground red pepper
• 1 pork tenderloin, sliced into 1 inch thick slices
• 6 peaches, halved and pitted
• Cooking spray

• Combine first 3 ingredients in a small saucepan; bring to a boil. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 25 minutes. Uncover and simmer 5 minutes. Place peach mixture in a food processor; process until smooth. Add 3/4 teaspoon salt, 1/8 teaspoon black pepper, vinegar, and next 4 ingredients (vinegar through red pepper); pulse to combine. Let stand 5 minutes. Place half of peach mixture in a large heavy-duty zip-top plastic bag; reserve other half for basting. Add tenderloin slices to bag; seal bag and refrigerate 30 minutes to 4 hours.
• Preheat grill.
• Remove pork from bag; discard marinade. Sprinkle pork with 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/8 teaspoon black pepper. Place pork and peach halves on grill rack coated with cooking spray, and grill 10 minutes or until the pork is done and the peaches are tender, turning once. Baste pork and peach halves with the reserved peach mixture every 2 minutes during the first 6 minutes of cooking.

Remember that wine you opened to make those peaches tipsy? Well, pour yourself a glass and take off that apron-cheers!

Hello, Fall!

I am so over summer.  Now, don't get me wrong, I am a warm weather kinda gal.  I mean, hell, I grew up in the Mid East and the Caribbean, for Pete's sake. The closest I came to the change of seasons was watching It's a Wonderful Life on a bootleg betamax video. So, moving to the the Southeast US has at least allowed me to enjoy damp and hot as well as damp and chilly. But right now? Right now, I am sick of my warm weather clothes.  You know what I'm talking about.  The way you feel when you go into your closet after your morning shower, stand there in your knickers, and feel your shoulders slump at the prospect of putting on those damn shorts one more time. Or that tank. Or anything that you've worn in the last 4 months.  I've even threatened to just go in my lingerie.  I mean, it is always lovely, and it's perfect for 100+ degrees, but there might be an awkward moment or two with the neighbors and their kids. 


But today, my lovelies, it won't go above 80! Hallelujah, no shorts! I am experimenting with a new way to do the outfit of the day on the blog, so bear with me.  I suck at photography, but at least this way I am showing you my actual clothes, rather than an internet grab of them.  I feel like this is more genuine, and much easier than trying to find what I own online.

Top: Anthropologie

Jeggings: Loft

Boots: Just Fabulous (a monthly shoe subscription website)

Scarf: Buckle 

Purse: Franco Sarto from TJMaxx

I like this look because it is very casual, yet still has enough of an edge to keep interest.  No, you don't have to be a stick figure to wear this.  I am a fit person, but just like everyone else there are bits that I don't like to emphasize.  Surprisingly, the balance of the form fitting jeggings and the loose, boyfriend style top works well to do exactly that.  The deep v of the top shows a bit of skin (even a hint of lingerie if you are small like me) without looking trashy. And the boots, well, you know I'm gonna have a heel, but you could just as easily pair this with a great pair of flat boots.

Now in honor of the less miserable temperatures, it's time to break out a great chili. When my husband and I were in college, we were vegetarians.  We still eat many meatless meals, and this chili is one of our favorites.

Meatless Layered Chili: (makes enough for 12 people)

1 T. olive oil

1 c. onion, finely diced

4 cloves garlic, finely diced

28 oz. can diced tomatoes

2 14 oz. cans pinto beans

2 14 oz. cans kidney beans (light or dark, your preference)

2 14 oz. cans black beans

2 T. chili powder

2 t. cumin

1 t. salt

2 t. dried oregano

2 t. cocoa

1 t. hot sauce

Heat oil in large stock pot.  Add onions and saute over medium heat for 5 minutes.  Add garlic and continue cooking for 2 minutes.  Add remaining ingredients and bring to a boil.  Reduce heat and simmer, covered, for at least one hour, stirring occasionally.

In bowls, layer with corn chips, cheese, sour cream, diced green onions, or whatever you love. Easy peasy and so delicious!

If I must be honest, the reason why I made the pie was because I cleaned out the fridge and realized I had 5 granny smiths that needed to be used and fast.  So, it was pie time!


This is the same pie crust recipe from my Way to a Man's Heart post.


Pie Crust:

For the crust: (Don't be tempted to use a store crust, it's just not the same.  They taste like cardboard.)

1 c. shortening

2 2/3 c. all purpose flour

1 t. salt

8 + T. cold water

Mix flour and salt together in a large bowl. Add shortening. Using a pastry blender or fork, cut  the flour and shortening in together until the particles are the size of small peas.  Add water a tablespoon at a time, and tossing with a fork until all the flour is moistened and pastry cleans the side of the bowl.  Add more water if necessary to achieve this.

Gather pastry into a ball and split into two halves.  Tear a sheet of wax paper about 12 inches long and sprinkle with flour.  Place one half on the wax paper and roll out to desired size for pie pan (it should be about 1/8 inch thick).  Invert onto pie pan and trim.  Repeat for the top sheet of crust.

Apple Pie Filling:

5 large granny smith apples, cored, peeled and sliced

1/4 c. all purpose flour

3/4 c. sugar

1 t. cinnamon

1 t. freshly ground nutmeg (trust me it's so much better than the pre-ground kind)

3 T. butter

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Mix flour, sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg together.  Add apples and stir well to coat.  Pour into crust lined pie pan. Dot with butter and seal with top crust.

Bake for 40-50 minutes. Dust off your apron and feel like a sexy June Cleaver, 'cause that's what you are, my lovelies!

Cheers!

A trip to New England

One of my many birthday presents this week was a culinary trip to one of my favorite places-New England.  When our girls were younger, we would take trips to New Hampshire and Maine every summer.  It was fabulous! Lake Winnepasaukee, the White Mountains and, of course, Tamarack Drive In in Laconia, New Hampshire would make for a cool respite from the hot, humid summers of the South.  Other years, we would take a drive to Bar Harbor, Maine or a ferry to Nova Scotia to experience the crisp coastal feel of the Northeast. It's been a while since we have had a vacation in those lovely places, but my husband transported me there on Friday evening with lobster rolls and whoopie pies. It was a taste of heaven!


It was 98 degrees with a heat index of the flames of hell that evening, so the only clothing choice that made sense was a pair of white walking shorts, a breezy t-strap tribal tank from Urban Outfitters, and a pair of snakeskin wedges. 

Admittedly, not my most inspired outfit, but weather and family appropriate for a night of great food and a fierce game of descending spades!

Thomas and the girls kept the menu under wraps until the very last moment.  They were determined to keep it a surprise.  Amazingly, they were able to-right up until the UPS man delivered a styrofoam cooler.  Needless to say, my curious mind started going into overdrive, and then I saw the buns.  Now, picture an ecstatic me dancing deliriously about the kitchen at the prospect of lobster rolls.

Thomas knew that neither he nor the girls would be okay with actually doing the deed of cooking a live lobster even if they could have found good quality ones here in Alabama.  Plus, Thomas wanted to get both quality and know that he had purchased responsibly. So, he ordered the lobster meat fresh prepared and overnighted from a fisherman's co-op called Lobster Co-op.com.  No middleman, just you and the guys who do the catching.

The result? The sweetest lobster I've tasted outside of New England.  

 For those of you who haven't had the opportunity to enjoy a Lobster Roll, let me clue you in on the lusciousness.  It's a basic seafood salad-like crab or shrimp salad-but with lobster.  LOBSTER! Served on a toasted, buttered bun with a bit of romaine.  Simple, yes.  But, oh, so delicious!


Lobster roll recipe

2 cups chopped lobster meat
1/4 cup mayonnaise
2 finely chopped scallions
1 stalk celery, finely diced
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tsp paprika
3 traditional split hot dog buns
2 tbsp unsalted butter, room temperature
1/3 cup shredded Iceberg or Romaine lettuce
salt




1. In a small mixing bowl combine the lobster meat with the mayonnaise, half the scallions, celery, lemon juice, half the paprika and some salt. Let the mixture sit on the counter for 10 minutes while you toast the buns.
2. To toast the hot dog buns, butter the outside of each bun liberally. Heat a dry skillet to medium-high heat and toast the buns on both sides until golden brown.
3. Once toasted, divide the lettuce between the buns. Top the lettuce with the lobster salad. Sprinkle each roll with the remaining paprika and scallions. Serve warm or room temperature with a lemon wedge.

Nope, that's not a homemade Oreo.  It's something far, far better.  Not too sweet, not too creamy, it's a handful of goodness called a Whoopie Pie.  The cookie is soft and the filling is NOT frosting.  Thomas found this recipe from a blog called Omnomicon, and this is her recipe.  Oh, so lovely!

Mom’s Famous Whoopie Pies
makes about 14 after batter & cookie sampling
brought to you by very fortunate family ties.

Blend	Add
1/4 c Crisco	2 c flour
1 c milk	1/4 c + 1 tbsp cocoa
1 c sugar	1.5 tsp baking soda
1 egg	1 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla

Drop by the small tablespoonful onto an ungreased cookie sheet—a tablespoon-sized bakery scoop works best. Bake exactly 8 minutes at 375^o, see if a toothpick comes out clean, and if it doesn’t, bake another 2 minutes (10 total). Upon extraction from the oven, remove from pan immediately to wire rack to cool.

And now the creme filling (reminder: it’s not frosting, guys)


1/2 c margarine or butter (room temp is best)
1/2 c Crisco (my mother is insistent that this MUST be Crisco and CANNOT be generic shortening, nor substituted in any way . . . but if you do get it to work with a substitution, please let me know!)
1 c sugar
1 tbsp  flour
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 c warm whole milk (20 seconds in the microwave should do it)
Beat with a mixer (stand or hand, your choice) for-freakin-ever. It will start out just like, well, lumps of Crisco floating in milk, then bits will get smaller and smaller, then it’ll slosh around for a little bit, and, much like the butter making process, you’ll be wondering if this will ever become anything or if you maybe messed it up somehow. Suddenly, about five minutes later, your mix will look weird for a second, and within moments your slushy mess will turn into a glorious white creme, smooth and perfect in a way rarely seen outside the confines of uber-processed food with chemicals you can’t pronounce that are not even available to the consumer in their pure form.

Assembly


As soon as the whoopie cookies are cool, match each whoopie with its closest brother in size—even if yours didn’t all come out the same size, evenly matched whoopies will look much much nicer. Spread some filling on the flat side of one, then place the second on top. Repeat. This does not need to be done immediately before serving, as the filling tends to maintain its consistency surprisingly well, and some (like my mom) would argue that a day-old whoopie pie is even better than fresh. I like them all.
No need to refrigerate, sealed plastic or plastic wrap will keep them fresh.
. . . and that’s it. Congratulations! You just made the best whoopie pies known to man.




Cheers, my lovelies, cheers!